5/10/2024 0 Comments Gaslighting at work examplesBy refusing to argue, you protect yourself and maintain control over the situation. Arguing can lead to further tension and put you in a position where you’re more vulnerable to manipulation. ![]() If they continue challenging you, don’t get drawn into conflict. ![]() Showing them any proof you have could help encourage them to back down. You know what happened, so repeat it calmly with confidence. If you remember something clearly and they flat out deny your memory, that’s gaslighting. Your brain typically doesn’t fabricate entire memories. Misremembering typically involves small details, such as the color of someone’s shirt or the other people in the room. Remain confident in your version of eventsĮveryone remembers things a little differently than how they happened on occasion, and you might wonder, “What if it did happen the way they said?”īut don’t give in to the urge to question yourself - they want you to doubt reality. This may be especially true if you’re highly anxious, as documenting gaslighting may lead to rumination, and this behavior could increase feelings of anxiety.ĥ. While collecting evidence, be sure to set boundaries and practice self-care so as not to overwhelm or increase anxiety. Store them in a safe place or keep them with you when possible. Just make sure to keep your notes on paper or your personal phone since your company may have access to work devices. You can also use your notes as evidence for workplace gaslighting. This alone can help boost confidence and make it easier to handle the gaslighting going forward. When you know the truth, you won’t question or doubt yourself. But having proof can go a long way toward restoring your peace of mind and supporting your emotional well-being. It’s not always safe to confront abuse in person. Laws in your area may prevent you from using these recordings if you need to seek legal assistance, but you can inform others about the situation. Use your phone to record conversations.Summarize your conversations, with direct quotes when possible.Save or take screenshots of texts and emails.When they deny a conversation or event took place, you can go back and check the truth for yourself. grounding yourself with a photo, object, or visualization exerciseĭocumenting your interactions with someone trying to gaslight you can help you keep track of what’s really happening.If you can’t physically leave, try instead: Going for a walk or stepping outside briefly can help you clear your mind and refocus. To get some physical space, suggest taking a break and revisiting the topic later. Keeping calm can also help you focus on the truth, making it less likely that their (false) version of events will sway your confidence and faith in yourself. But they may not back down, and your distress can encourage them to keep trying to manipulate you. You might want to deny what the person trying to gaslight you has said - after all, it’s completely untrue. Remaining calm can help you handle the situation more effectively. It’s understandable to experience a lot of strong emotions when dealing with gaslighting.Īnger, frustration, worry, sadness, fear - these feelings, and any others, are all completely valid, but try not to let them guide your immediate reaction. When considering whether someone is trying to gaslight you, take stock of your feelings, not just their actions. “I don’t have time to listen to this” or “Don’t you think you’re overreacting?” may not be helpful responses, but they don’t always mean the other person wants to manipulate you. People can also gaslight unintentionally. Insisting “You’re wrong! I know what I’m talking about” isn’t necessarily polite, but it’s generally not gaslighting if they aren’t trying to manipulate you. People sometimes feel convinced of their own knowledge and insist they’re right, even when evidence suggests otherwise. ![]() So, someone who offers a different opinion than yours, even in a rude or critical way, isn’t necessarily gaslighting. The person gaslighting you generally wants you to doubt yourself and depend on their version of reality. True gaslighting develops into a repeated pattern of manipulation. Gaslighting isn’t always easy to recognize, especially since it often starts small, and other behaviors can sometimes seem similar.
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